I have been off the tabulas pages for a long time.

I can't even remember the blur that was the past couple of months. It was as if I was sucked into a cosmic anomaly where I remain suspended in limbo and forced to work without rest.

Of course I do get to rest as well, but nowhere near as much as I would want to. I'm pretty sure the boys feel the same way, but this "work" thing never stops.

It seems to get worse every year, but thankfully this increase inf difficulty (and quantity) of work comes with a wider range of freedom. Not total freedom, but at least the sensation of freedom. This also means greater liability.

I never thought I'd say it before, but I expected it anyway. So now I'll say it.


Sana estudyante na lang ako ulit.

I should be writing my paper right now, but instead I'm updating my blog for the second time in a week (after a two month absence no less). But certain things must be said.

I have been working non-stop to no end lately. Stage FX has been eating up a lot of my time and frankly a lot of myself as well. I'm freaking out because production hasn't even officially begun yet!

On top of this, checking papers (I'm sorely behind on checking some quizzes, compositions and projects) and this little thing called "teaching" gets in the way of all the work. I know it should be the other way around, teaching should be the main thing, but now going to class just seems to be just another obstacle in this race.

It's pretty hard to be all together all the time especially when you've only had 3 hours of sleep every night for a week. Things will definitely fall apart. It does not help when certain classes -cough-3C-cough- are so damn noisy!

#%$@*&!!!! I just really wanted to shout at everyone in class earlier, but I had no energy. It was just so discouraging to teach when no one's listening. It's even harder to care about your students when they don't seem to care about the lesson. It was simply not important to them.

It would have been pointless to have gotten really mad earlier. Maybe I'm just caring less.

I was absent twice this week. It's the first time that I've ever been absent since I started teaching (The other other times were official school business: a retreat, a meeting and grad school).

I was nauseated last Sunday. I started barfing after lunch. Soon after that I barfed out my breakfast.

After that diarrhea set in.

By Monday morning I was too dehydrated to work. Fortunately I called in sick the night before.

The problem is that I felt so guilty about resting that on Monday night I started working like a madman. I barely slept that night, so come Tuesday morning, I was feeling some chest pains.

I took no notice of the pain and went to work.

Some last minute trouble before the assembly had me literally hitting my head. I wanted to find a rock to hit myself with (Note to self: this explains the phenomenon of me calling students I don't want to call in class).

Stress has become palpable.

1G was dead. 1B was too lively.

Those two classes took their toll on me. By the time I was in the middle of 1B, I was feeling faint. I dragged myself to the GS infrmary and they sent me to the ER of Cardinal Santos.

Man, that was the first time I've been to the ER in a long time. It wasn't fun.

I had my first ECG. The doctor said the problem wasn't my heart. He did however give me some prescription painkillers.

As soon as I arrived, I rushed to 3C to see if I can make it back to class. I did and it was worth it. Those guys made the struggle worthwhile.

However I didn't feel too good after.

I still persisted and attended Stage FX. I felt even worse. We cancelled the midyear production.

Good thing Ivy accompanied me on the way home.

Pasaway.

I was absent today because I still felt dizzy this morning.

Pasaway.

I slept at around 9PM last night. I woke up at 5AM today. Then I slept at 7AM and woke up at 1PM.

Astig.